Prompt:
Lily refuses to call her father "Daddy."
Response Requirement: (Use a quote)
* What sorts of things does he do or say that explain her reasoning?
* What are your thoughts on him as a person, a husband, or a father?
Friday, March 5, 2010
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Lily explains why she doesn’t call her dad, “daddy”. It does not fit him. He just goes along, working in the peach orchards. T-Ray is Lily’s daddy, and he works with Rosaleen in the orchards. Rosaleen is the working house mother that was around since Lily’s mother died. She took care of the family and cleaned the house while T-Ray works out in the orchards. I think he is not a great father because he can be very abusive towards Lily and her mother. Her mother was more loving to her besides her daddy.
ReplyDeleteWe can make an assumption that her dad isn’t the greatest person to be around because he can be very abusive to Lily. He is also to her mother as well. They aren’t good together in the same room.
I think the reason that she doesn’t call her father daddy anymore is for a bunch of reasons. The first reason is her father is abusive. He makes her kneel on grits and like we did in class today it can hurt after a while. He makes sure that she cannot do normal things like other people. He made her legs bleed because he thought she was with a boy. Also, he did not get Rosaleen out of jail and let her stay there. He also told her that her mother left her and came back to get her things.
ReplyDeleteI don’t think T-Ray is a good father. I actually think T-Ray loves Lily but is extremely over protective. He made her kneel in grits because she might have been hanging out with boys. If what he said was true about her mother then he loved her enough to keep at home. I get that he left Rosaleen in jail but maybe he was afraid that she would take her away from him. I do not think he is a good father or good person from what we know not a great husband just over protected.
GentleGiant8
Lily refuses to call T. Ray daddy because in her ind he isn't a father. A father is someone who loves his children and is always there for them. A father is also someone who doesn't hurt their children learn and grow and sometimes they have to yell but they just do that so they can teach their child a lesson and help them learn about life and what life has in store for them. A father is also somebody who wants to see their children succeed at life and to guide them to be what they want to be. T. Ray in a sense, is none of those things. He isn't caring and he doesn't want Lily to succeed and he really teaches her lessons that aren't going to help her in later life. An example of that is the punishment of making her kneel on grits for a long time which really isn't going to teach her anything but hate him more for punishing her so hard for little things she did. She also even admits on how she doesn't even think that daddy is a good name for T. Ray.
ReplyDeleteIn my opinion I think that T. Ray is a very cruel person. He is very cruel to Lily and sometimes to Rosaleen. He isn't the type of person that is ever really happy. He reminds of a dictator because he always dictates Lily and makes her do things that are very bad. He also is a very bad father in my opinion because he always never really pays attention to Lily and her needs and doesn't want her to read because he thinks that it will lead ideas of college and he didn't want to pay for college which in my opinion is very wrong because he should be the one pressuring her to go to collage.
Lily has very good reason to not call T.Ray “daddy.” He treats her like his made. He makes her kneel on grits for and hour which is very, very painful. Every time she asks any questions about her mother he tells her to shut up. Lily has a dream of becoming a writer when she is older but T.Ray doesn’t support her on her dream.I think he is such a bad father because he shouldn’t treat his very own daughter like his made. I think he is a terrible husband because he abused and hit his wife especially in front of his kids.
ReplyDeletePrompt:
ReplyDeleteLily refuses to call her father "Daddy."
Response Requirement: (Use a quote)
* What sorts of things does he do or say that explain her reasoning?
* What are your thoughts on him as a person, a husband, or a father?
Lily introduced her father by commenting “my daddy—who I call T. Ray because ‘Daddy’ never fits him…”,and that statement defines their relationship. “Daddy” is a word used to describe someone who is not only a father, but someone who is caring, loving, and kind. T. Ray doesn’t fit any of those words due to his lack of love for his only daughter and the many punishments he chooses to invent. Lily once stated that “… my father was Thomas Edison when it came to inventing punishments.” For example, when Lily once chose to talk back to him, he told her that her pet rabbit had died and let her cry all night. In the mourning her rabbit was perfectly fine. He made her sit on her knees in grits for hours, doesn’t care about Lily’s birthday, and has lied to Lily for punishment. Over all, someone who you would call “Daddy” would be loving, caring, and a kind person. T. Ray seems to be the opposite of that and I can’t blame Lily not being able to call her father “Daddy”.
As a person T. Ray seems to be angry, bitter, and enjoys watching others suffer. Personally, I believe T. Ray is an awful father who could care less about what happens to his own child. He makes her sit in grits for hours on suspicion, something an ordinary parent wouldn’t even let their child do for ten minutes. T. Ray yells at her and doesn’t even bother to remember her birthday or get her the charm bracelet she wants. The kind of things I can picture most parents doing is surprising their child with whatever they wanted, and singing Happy Birthday. Lily wouldn’t even put it past him to lie about her mother being ready to abandon her, which means Lily doesn’t even trust him at all. T. Ray also seemed like a poor husband since of the fight between him and Lily’s mom was so bad that a gun was pulled out. People fight, but pulling out a gun means Lily’s mom lacked trust in T. Ray, just like Lily. In the end, T. Ray seems like an angry person who lashed out at everyone as well as being bitter, and just an unpleasant person.
Lily outright refuses to call her father Daddy. This is because of his harshness, his hard-to-love sense of justice, and his constant bitterness. He has so many frowned-upon qualities and reserves all of his good ones for his dog, Snout. Lily even mentions it: "His only kindness was for Snout, his bird-dog..." I think T.Ray's happiness, his compassion for others sort of died with Deborah. I think he sees her in Lily, in everyone maybe. Bits and pieces of his wife are in people he knows, especially in Lily. So T.Ray is not a father,let alone a Daddy. He is not caring, he is not kind to his daughter. So that is why Lily doesn't call him Daddy.
ReplyDeleteT.Ray, a husband, a father and a person. I wouldn’t use any of those words to describe him. In chapter one, when Lily had a flashback to that dreadful day of her mother’s death, I believe Deborah was planning to leave her husband. From what details we were giving, it seems to me like T.Ray was abusing her. “I saw him take her by the shoulders and shake her, her head bouncing back and forth. I saw the whiteness of his lips.” My thoughts on him as a husband are abusive, ruthless, and temperamental. My thoughts on him as a father are pretty much the same. He shows no signs of loving his daughter or even caring about her in any form. I also believe he is beating poor Lily as well. “I swayed from knee to knee, hoping for a second or two of relief, but the pain cut deep into my skin. It is quite obvious that T.Ray has some anger management issues. If I were Lily, I to would also refuse to call this monster “Daddy”. He isn’t loving, nurturing or supporting like a father should be. Also, he told Lily that her mother left her. Why would he do that? She already felt unloved as is. I don’t think this is true. I have a feeling he made that up t punish Lily for talking back to him as well as getting arrested. That is another example of his cruel and unusual punishments that he inflicts onto poor Lily.
ReplyDeleteBlogger8 the t-ray pad due 3-13-10
ReplyDeleteShe doesn’t call him daddy for many different reasons. The first one would be that he always yells at her and doesn’t want to talk about her mom or how she died. He also treats her like a servant telling her what to do, when to do things. She was also telling him that she’s growing up and needs new clothes and would like to get some jewelry. He also sort of abuses her by shoving her around picking her up and dropping her. If I was her I wouldn’t call her daddy, heck I wouldn’t even call him family.
I have some very harsh thoughts of him as a person let alone a father. For example he treats his daughter as if she’s animal which is very inhumane. He treats his house keeper like a slave ordering her to do all different things yelling at her which is very uncivilized. As a father I think he should be arrested for treating his daughter that way, he yells at her and abuses her. This man is a terrible person and a worse father.
In the novel so far, Lily is adamant on not calling her father “Dad” or “Father” but simply T.Ray. According to her, it’s because she doesn’t depict T.Ray as a fatherly figure. She says she never looked at T.Ray as a father, due to the fact that he acts like he abhors her and she has absolutely no bond with him. The reason that they have drifted so far apart is because of the malevolent punishments that he gives her, such as putting her elbows and knees on the grits. However, the only reason he even acts like this in general is because his wife was “accidently” shot for as far as we know, which turned him into a bitter man. Also, he lies countless times to manipulate and punish Lily. He once told her that her rabbit had expired because she talked back, even though it didn’t. Due to the constant lying, Lily can’t trust him at all and it only contributes to one of the reasons Lily doesn’t acknowledge T.Ray as her fatherly figure.
ReplyDeleteAs a parent, T. Ray isn’t exactly the Nanny. He uses crude, physical punishments on the slightest forms of defiance. Also, he neglects his daughter’s yearning to go to pep rallies and whatnot, which is turning her into an antisocial bum. As a person, or member of society, we don’t really know how he acts. I speculate that he has no friends and no one pays attention to him. However, they don’t look down on him because he’s white and during that racial time period, majority of the time, you were looked down upon if you were colored. As a husband, he may have been imperfect and rude which is why Lily’s mom left him. On the other hand, he got her to marry him in the first place, so he couldn’t have been all that bad.
In conclusion, I would have to agree with what Anne Frank once said. “In spite of everything, I believe that there is still good in everyone’s heart.” This pertains to my belief of T.Ray as an individual. In my opinion he is a nice guy, who’d been through some rough times. You can’t expect someone to lost their spouse and still be roses and daisies. This is what I think of T.Ray as an individual.
Lily has good reason not to call T.Ray “daddy.” This is so because he is really mean to her. The only thing that T.Ray cares about is the orchard, the house, his dog, and himself. T.Ray never lets Lily do anything. He doesn’t let her go to sleepovers or any of the other activities girls her age do. T.Ray doesn’t even buy clothes for Lily. Lily has to sew them herself. When T.Ray sends Lily out to work the peach stand, he never lets her bring a book for entertainment. He doesn’t care a thing about her, therefore not earning the title of “Daddy.”
ReplyDeleteIn my thoughts T.Ray is a horrible person, husband, and father. He is always mean, with only a care for himself. T.Ray was also probably the reason that Lily’s mom was running away. She probably hated living with him, and couldn’t take it any longer. T.Ray is also horrible because he lies. For example, he told Lily that her mom was running away because of her. This is really mean because for a while she believed it. T.Ray is not a person I would love to live with, and I feel sorry for Lily.
In the beginning of the novel, Lily mentioned that she doesn't refer to her dad as "daddy" because that name doesn't suit him. As I am porceeding with the reading, I am beginning to see why. For eaxample, he doesn't treat Lily like a daughter. Lily even went on to mention that his only love is for his bird dog, Snout. Whens Lily was with Rosaleen when she got arrested, he was saying how he was lucky he got her out of jail. He didn't seem worried or concerned about what had happened. Also, a normal parent would want ot celebrate his daughter's birthday, or even get her a present for that matter. T. Ray didn't seem to care about Lily's birthday or had any interest in getting her a present. The worst part, though, is that he practically abuses her. According to Lily, T. Ray is like thomas Edison when it comes to inventing horrible punishments. There is one punishment is called the Martha Whites, in which Lily must kneel on a huge pile of grits for hours at a time. Most normal [arents who want to discipline their children will just send them to their room or make them sit in the corner. No one dreams of punishments for their kids. In fact, most parents will say that's the worst part.
ReplyDeleteThe way T.Ray acts toward Lily says a lot about the kind of person he may be. In general, he probably is just an terrible person with an ugly personality. Lily entioned he was very ornery. If someone has an orneriness about them, they aren't usually the type of person one would want to be around. His need of control probably is what made his wife want to leave him. From the situations I mentioned before, T.Ray doesn't seem like a good father either. There are people who are said to be beautiful from the inside out, but then there are people like T.Ray, who are ugly from the outside, all the way down to their core.
Lily has good reasons why not to call her father daddy. T. Ray seems like a very abusive father. So, why should Lily call her father daddy if he abuses her and lies to her all the time. For example, on page 39 T. Ray said, "Your mother?" His face bright red. "You think that goddamn woman gave a shit about you?"
ReplyDelete"My mother loved me!" I cried.
When T. Ray said this to Lily she know that he was lying but it still got her upset and a few tear shed. I wouldn't blame Lily for running away, I would so the same thing if my father was abusive.
My thoughts of T. Ray are that he is very abusive and no one should have a father like that and it's good that Lily ran away. Also, I think that T. Ray isn't a very good person, he only thinks of himself. When T. Ray gets mad he puts others down to make himself feel better.
Based on what T.Ray does and says to Lily, it is obvious why she doesn’t call him “Daddy”. T.Ray doesn’t treat Lily with the loving care like a father is supposed to. For example, as a punishment, T.Ray makes Lily kneel on grits for an hour, and in the morning, her knees are swollen with bruises. T.Ray doesn’t really care for Lily like a responsible father should. He doesn’t provide her anything that she wants or needs. He also doesn’t acknowledge her birthday or buy her a gift. Lily doesn’t call her father “Daddy” because he doesn’t act like one at all. Rosaleen is the closest thing she has to a parent. Rosaleen is the one who cooks, takes care of Lily, and buys her the things she needs. T.Ray doesn’t take any responsibility of being a father and all he does is scold Lily. In the book, Lily stated, “His only kindness was for Snout, his bird dog.”
ReplyDeleteAs a person, I think T.Ray is really self-centered and doesn’t care about anyone else. He just does whatever will make himself happy, regardless of how other people will feel. I can understand if Lily’s mother wanted to run away from him because he is so obnoxious, but why she married him in the first place is still a mystery. I think it is better that Lily has run away because now he can do whatever he wants and it wont effect anyone but himself. T.Ray is the exact opposite of what a father should be. He doesn’t make a very good father because he doesn’t love his daughter. If he loved Lily, he would never hurt her physically or emotionally. T.Ray isn’t someone who has kind feelings towards other people. His wife, who may have loved him before is dead, and maybe if he wasn’t so violent, she may still be alive. His only daughter has now just run away from him, and if he loved her a little more, Lily may not have run away with such a burning hatred for her father. He may not realize it, but by acting so intolerable, he is cutting away at the people in his life that could have loved him more than anything.
“If you've never been hated by your child, you've never been a parent.”
ReplyDeleteThat goes for most people in the world. I for one, sometimes tell both my parents that I hate them and they don't react. They know i say the things i say out of anger. Every child has probably told a parent that they hated them.
On Lily's defense, she actually HATES her father T. Ray. She even refuses to call her "daddy". I don't blame her. how could anybody call, somebody daddy if they don't even put in an effort to be one.
I think T. Ray is disgusting, and he makes me sick. I absolutely hate it when parents despise their children. It makes me sick to my stomach. I feel extremely bad for Lily for having to put up with him for fourteen years.
Lily never ever calls her dad, Daddy. She calls him T.Ray. Some things that he says to Lily are horrible and no dad, or person for that madder, should stuff like that. Like he said that her mother never loved her and she left them. And then when Lily ran out to go to her secret place out in the orchards, he made her kneels on grits (which hurt ALOT) just because she ran out to be alone. Then Lily said,”…I feel that he makes up ways to torture me.” Later on that same page you can read about a different way that he punished her. He really shouldn’t have been a father. He would be up there on the worst father I read about. He doesn’t deserve to be called “Daddy”, I would have named him a different name just like Lily did.
ReplyDelete~Secretflower1~
Lily refuses to call her father “daddy.” Instead, she calls him T. Ray. Lily doesn’t call him daddy because he simply does not act like a true father. He has never really been the loving father figure to Lily, forcing her to live her life without loving parents. T. Ray doesn’t seem to care about Lily or her happiness. He continuously ignores her and spends most of his time in the orchards, only speaking to his daughter when he commands her to sell peaches. Lily cannot even simply read, because T. Ray doesn’t allow her to bring books to the peach stand – where she the majority of her days. T. Ray is also rather abusive. He enforces harsh punishments on Lily, such as having her kneel on grits for an hour until her knees are wounded and she’s forced to limp.
ReplyDeleteMy thoughts on T. Ray are all negative. As a husband and a father, he abused his wife and child. T. Ray was never kind or positive towards his family. He makes Lily miserable by only yelling at her and punishing her, never offering the kind, loving feelings of an actual father figure. Because T. Ray behaves so awful towards the people that are kind to him, I don’t think he is a good person at all.
So far, in the book T-Ray has been mean and abusive towards Lily and not a good father figure. Some of the things he does are diabolical, like making her kneel on the grits for hours on end. He also verbally abuses her by telling Lily that her mother left her and was coming back to get her things when Lily shot her. T-Ray also told Lily that her pet rabbit died even when it was fine. Apart from hurting her internally and externally, he does not pay much attention to her since he spends most of the day out in the orchard. As a person I view him as a bad person/father and not worthy of having a daughter or even to be let around people.
ReplyDeleteT-ray is not called daddy by Lilly for many reasons. One reason is that he does not act like a daddy. He is always abusive towards her,makes her kneel on grits, and he never treats her like a young lady or a daughter. he brainwashes her to think that she killed her mother, when it actually was'nt her.
ReplyDeleteNOT DONE!!!!
T-Ray does a lot of things that justify Lily not calling him “Daddy.” For instance he constantly blames Lily for her mother’s death. Because of his constant verbal and emotional abuse in that way she now blames herself everyday for killing her mother. The ways that T-Ray physically abuses Lily are very brutal as well. One example is him having her kneel on the uncooked grits. Also, when Rosaleen and Lily got arrested T-Ray said that Lily was lucky that he got her out of jail after Rosaleen poured her snuff jug filled with spit on Franklin Posey’s shoes. But what Rosaleen did to Franklin Posey paled in comparison to him hitting her in the forehead with the flashlight. Not Done!!!
ReplyDeleteThere are many reasons why Lily calls her father T. Ray. In the book Secret Life of Bees it states that the name “Daddy” never fit him, so that’s why Lily calls him T. Ray. Some things that he says or do to make her not call him “Daddy” are lying to her, not being there for her, beat her, not taking care of her; hungering help. My thoughts of him as a person are stubborn, mean, and not caring. As a husband I think T. Ray was selfish, and probably didn’t let Lily’s mother do anything and that’s what he says to Lily, that her mother left and never die.
ReplyDeleteSome things that T. Ray says to Lily is that her mother never liked her, never cared about her. Thought she was worthless and a waste of time. He also beats her, sometimes just because she didn’t respond correctly. He is not an idol for the perfect father. I think T-Ray as a person is a mean selfish person. He treats her like she isn’t a person. I also belive the only reason T.Ray likes her is because lily is a resemblance of her mom, that T.Ray really likes.
ReplyDeleteLily refuses to call T. Ray her “daddy,” and it is fairly obvious as to why. “Daddy” is a term of endearment, reserved for loving fathers. T. Ray is an abusive man who used to push around Lily’s mother, and now takes his anger off on his daughter. He punishes her because he can, and constantly intimidates and bullies Lily. In fact, it seems that he treats his pet dog more humanely than his own daughter.
ReplyDeleteI have a very negative opinion of T. Ray. He was an abusive husband and an abusive father. Lily has no one to trust except for Rosaleen thanks to her father. Instead of being a role-model for Lily, he treats her horribly and makes up lies about her mother just to spite her. He is a horrible husband, father, and an all around cruel person. In fact, when Lily ran away from him, I was happy for her. T. Ray doesn’t deserve to be called “Daddy,” he’s too mean as a person to be called anything positive.
Lily does not call T-Ray dad for many reasons. From the cruel punishments to the very harsh voice, T-Ray does not deserve to be called dad. Lily hates how her “father” treats her. When Lily does one thing wrong, her father makes her kneel on grits. For hours Lily would have to stay there baring the pain. Leaving welts on her knees she hates this punishment. Another mean thing that prevents Lily from calling T-Ray dad is because of his very harsh voice. In the book we never hear T-Ray speak. He is always yelling. The final reason why T-Ray does not deserve to be called dad is that he does not care about her. He doesn’t care what she wears. He would care if she went naked. That is why T-Ray is just T-Ray and not dad.
ReplyDeleteI think that the situation Lily has been put in has tragically impacted her life. First of she killed her own mother, that would be enough guilt to mess me up for the rest of my life. If that wasn’t bad enough she has to live with T. Ray, who basically has no respect or care for his daughter! She also has little friends and people to talk to. I believe that through out this living torture chamber she has changed. After living with T. Ray she has become tougher and without a mom she is more independent. Mainly I think she is lost inside, with no love except for Roseleen.
ReplyDeleteNot Finished
Lily refuses to call her father "Daddy."
ReplyDeleteResponse Requirement: (Use a quote)
* What sorts of things does he do or say that explain her reasoning?
* What are your thoughts on him as a person, a husband, or a father?
T-ray seems to be an agitating, control freak father that needs to know where Lily Rosaleen is every second. Plus, he punishes Lily for very unusual reasons, with very unusual punishments.
My thoughts on T-ray are that he is a person who abducted, and abuses Lily.
In the book The Secret Life of Bees, the main character refuses to call her own father Daddy for many reasons. These reasons include him being abusive physically and mentally, and him telling Lily that she was the one who caused her mother to supposedly leave when really she died and it was not her fault at all. Her father is called T-Ray by her instead. He is abusive to Lily in many ways. One way includes a punishment called Martha Whites. This is when he creates mounds of dry Grits and forces Lily to kneel on them for hours. Another way that he is abusive is by not paying attention to her at all, even when there is a problem. For example, when she had a swarm of bees gliding around her room, she asked him for help and he just yelled at her. And when he did go into her room to see, the bees had already flown out the window and he then cursed at her and made her feel worthless.
ReplyDeleteI personally believe T-Ray as a husband, person, and a father does not act appropriately to other people, especially his own daughter. He abuses her in many ways physically and mentally. Also, I believe that he was a bad husband because when Lily was describing the scene when her mother died, T-Ray seemed to have been going after Lily’s mom. I think that he was the one who killed her. This is what I think of T-Ray as a husband, person, and father.
Lilly explains in the beginning of the book that the title of ‘Daddy’ does not fit him. T- Ray denies her of the simplest things. Such as bristle rollers and a decent birthday present. He doesn’t treat Lilly as a daughter; he refuses to listen to her, and doesn’t help her when he needs her. Lots of things T-ray says and does are not very father-like. T-ray is a bully and Lilly is just an innocent girl stand around. “The truth is, your sorry mother ran off and left you. The day she died, she’d come back to get her things, that’s all.”
ReplyDeleteIn the novel so far, Lily is adamant on not calling her father “Dad” or “Father” but simply T.Ray. According to her, it’s because she doesn’t depict T.Ray as a fatherly figure. “He just isn’t the type of person who looks like a dad.” She says she never looked at T.Ray as a father, due to the fact that he acts like he abhors her and she has absolutely no bond with him. The reason that they have drifted so far apart is because of the malevolent punishments that he gives her, such as putting her elbows and knees on the grits. However, the only reason he even acts like this in general is because his wife was “accidently” shot for as far as we know, which turned him into a bitter man. Also, he lies countless times to manipulate and punish Lily. He once told her that her rabbit had expired because she talked back, even though it didn’t. Due to the constant lying, Lily can’t trust him at all and it only contributes to one of the reasons Lily doesn’t acknowledge T.Ray as her fatherly figure.
ReplyDeleteAs a parent, T. Ray isn’t exactly the Nanny. He uses crude, physical punishments on the slightest forms of defiance. Also, he neglects his daughter’s yearning to go to pep rallies and whatnot, which is turning her into an antisocial bum. As a person, or member of society, we don’t really know how he acts. I speculate that he has no friends and no one pays attention to him. However, they don’t look down on him because he’s white and during that racial time period, majority of the time, you were looked down upon if you were colored. As a husband, he may have been imperfect and rude which is why Lily’s mom left him. On the other hand, he got her to marry him in the first place, so he couldn’t have been all that bad.
In conclusion, I would have to agree with what Anne Frank once said. “In spite of everything, I believe that there is still good in everyone’s heart.” This pertains to my belief of T.Ray as an individual. In my opinion he is a nice guy, who’d been through some rough times. You can’t expect someone to lost their spouse and still be roses and daisies. This is what I think of T.Ray as an individual.
Lily doesn’t call T. Ray “Daddy” because all he wants to do is work in the peach orchards and be with his dog. Lily doesn’t really see T. Ray as a dad because he never wants to be around her, only when she is working in the peach orchards. T. Ray is a very bad father because he abuses Lily and takes control of her all the time. He is a very aggressive and angry person who doesn’t want to deal with other people’s problems. He was probably a very bad husband also because he might have taken advantage of his wife just like he does with Lily. T. Ray can only have things the way he wants them and when he wants them.
ReplyDeleteThe type of things T-Ray does and says that explains the reason why she doesn’t call him daddy is because he is abusive and fathers shouldn’t be abusive to their children. For one instance he made her kneel on grits for more then an hour because he thought that she was with a boy when she really wasn’t. He also blames the mother’s death on her and Lily has to live with that hanging over her head. T-Ray also makes up a bunch lies to make lily feel really bad and also to punish her for things she does. Such as he tells Lily that her bunny died when it really wasn’t and then he also said that her mother didn’t care about her because Lily said she hated him. I think that he is a very mean person in general. I also think that he is a horrible father and husband. I think this because in the flash back Lily remembered T-Ray pushing her to the ground and she remembers the mother left because of T-Ray so he must have been bad to her too.
ReplyDeleteI don’t blame Lily for not wanting to call T. Ray her daddy. He doesn’t act like a dad at all, but more like a master and Lily is his slave. An example of his cruelty is on page 24. “Get up from there,” he yelled. I followed him back to the house. His feet struck the ground so hard I felt sorry for the black earth. He didn’t speak till we reached the kitchen and he pulled the Martha White grits from the pantry. … He poured a mound of grits the size of an anthill onto the pine floor. “Get over here and kneel down.” I’d been kneeling on grits since I was six, but still I never got used to that powdered-glass feeling beneath my skin. … T. Ray sat in a chair and cleaned his nails with a pocketknife.” I want to know what a six year old child can do to deserve the punishment of kneeling of grits! This shows that T. Ray doesn’t treat Lily like his daughter, but like a slave, so why should Lily have to treat her dad like a dad? He also gets furious at Lily when she wakes him up to show him the bees, but then they disappear right before he comes in. It’s not her fault that the bees left, but then he just thinks she’s trying to get attention and there were never any bees.
ReplyDelete“The truth is, your sorry mother ran off and left you. The day she died, she’d come back to get her things, that’s all. You can hate me all you want, but she’s the one who left you.” Lily’s mom may have left like T. Ray said, but he probably changed the story a little. The real reason she left most likely was because T. Ray abused her as well. Based on how much he punishes Lily for no reason, you can conclude that he was an all around violent man. Lily’s mom probably got abused multiple times from him, and didn’t want to put up with him anymore. T. Ray perhaps told Lily that fake reason to make her feel guilty for something she shouldn’t be guilty for. Based on all the anger T. Ray has towards everything and everyone in the first four chapters, I can conclude that he isn’t a good husband, father, or person in general.
Lily refuses to call her father daddy, she calls him T. Ray. She doesn’t believe it fits him, I think this is because he is to much of a father to her. He has lied to her in the past and is always very mean to her. I think he is an angry person and I believe that the anger comes from his wife dying. If he was my father I would run away just as Lily did. When she tries to talk to him, for example when she asks him about her birthday girt he ignores her. If he was my father I don’t think I would be able to call him dad either I would rather just call him T. Ray like Lily does.
ReplyDeleteT. Ray says that Lily’s mother ran away the day she was killed and I believe T. Ray is the reason for her running off. It was the same reason Lily ran off, he is mean and not a fun person to be with.
There are various reasons why Lily doesn’t call T-Ray her “Father”. One reason is because he is not very nice to her of her “family”. He is always annoyed with her, and he never has patience for her. For example, when Lily wanted to show T-Ray the bees in her room, he said that it better be something important, and just wanted to sleep and not care what she was showing him. I think that she doesn’t call him Daddy, because he doesn’t fill the description of a Father, loving, caring, and supportive.
ReplyDeleteMy thoughts on him as a person are not so good. I feel like he would be a jerk and have no patience for anything that he doesn’t care about. If you even tried to ask him a question that he did not have interest in he would just ignore you or be obnoxious about it. If I where Lily I would run away too!!!
Lily refuses to call her dad "Daddy." T-Ray is just a terrible father and I mean like he is cruel. T-Ray doesn’t show Lily any love and doesn’t get her anything. He doesn’t give Lily support and creates punishments that no kid should go through. T- Ray told Lily that she killed her mother when she was young. A father shouldn’t tell their child that, he should have just said that her mom’s appendix exploded. Plus he tells Lily that her mother didn’t even like Lily. I don’t think I would call him dad either. T-Ray shouldn’t be allowed to take of Lily or any other thing. My thought of T-Ray as a person is that he is the devil.
ReplyDeleteThere are many reasons behind why lily doesn’t choose to call her father “Daddy.” It seems so far in “The Life of Bees” that her and her father don’t get along too well at all. This could be maybe because she doesn’t have a mother around to cope, or it could just be based on how cruel T. Ray can be to Lily that she realizes he does not take on the stage of being a father, so he shouldn’t be called one. Things that he doest to her really trigger Lily’s feelings for him. For example, it seems as if Lily is always in trouble when she really isn’t and because she’s in “trouble” her father makes her kneel on Grits for hours. If you like to watch your daughter in pain, you’re not healthy and there is something extremely wrong with you for you to believe having your daughter suffer is a good punishment for anything.
ReplyDeleteMy thoughts on him as a person aren’t too positive, but that is only because he does not show himself in an appropriate manner. To impress others and make people think he’s a good person, he needs to not curse so much, needs to treat others better, and needs to learn that his daughter’s life is being cut back socially because of him and his decisions. I understand why Deborah, Lily’s mother, left when Lily was young because I would not want to spend one moment of my life married to that man. Lord knows what he would do to me based on how he treats his own daughter. And lastly, as a father, T. Ray has many issues in his life, but adds so much more by being so cruel to his daughter. If he was nice to her and bought her a few new clothes, Lily wouldn’t be going all over the place, finding things interesting to do and being annoyed by it. My father always tells me if anyone were ever do anything to me, he wouldn’t mind being locked in jail for killing them which shows me how much he cares about me and gives me one less thing to worry about, if only Lily had something like that with her father.
Lily does not call T-ray daddy for a couple of good reasons. One is he treats her like she is an animal. He also has no respect for her. Lily made a good move in her life by running away from the demon T-ray. If Lilly didn't run away I think that someone should have call some type of child abuse center to get Lily taken away from T-ray. I also think that T-ray should have been sent to jail for what he did to Lily, and in prison the inmates don't take lightly to child abusers. That is what i think about T-ray and what should have happen to him.
ReplyDeleteT-Ray does a lot of things that justify Lily not calling him “Daddy.” For instance he constantly blames Lily for her mother’s death. Because of his constant verbal and emotional abuse in that way, she now blames herself everyday for killing her mother. The ways that T-Ray physically abuses Lily are very brutal as well. One example is him having her kneel on the uncooked grits. Also, when Rosaleen and Lily got arrested T-Ray said that Lily was lucky that he got her out of jail after Rosaleen poured her snuff jug filled with spit on Franklin Posey’s shoes. But what Rosaleen did to Franklin Posey paled in comparison to him hitting her on the forehead with the flashlight and beating her up before she got arrested.
ReplyDeleteI think that as a person T-Ray is horrible. He shows blatant disregard for Rosaleen and Lily’s wellbeing. Also as a father T-Ray fails. There is a line between discipline and child abuse that T-Ray crosses constantly. Back then child abuse laws were much more lenient and as long as the child didn’t die you pretty much were in the clear. As a husband T-Ray still failed miserably. Deborah was going to leave him but that day was the day she died. The only thing that T-Ray did right in his life was burying Deborah after she died.
T. Ray is like a shark. He really doesn’t care about anyone but himself, and is scared to show his feelings because he is afraid that people will mistake him for a softie. However, in reality even the tough guys have to show how they feel- that’s just the way it is. My thoughts on T. Ray are that when Deborah, Lily’s mom, died, a part of him died with her. The good that she brought out in him is long gone, and now he has to live with Lily who does nothing but remind him of his dead wife. If I were in his situation, I can’t say I would be too happy either. (But I wouldn’t hit my kid!) I think that T. Ray should just be thankful that he still has Lily. He should let Lily bring out the good in him that Deborah probably did. He shouldn’t spend his days just moping around and making people sit on pyramids of grits.
ReplyDeleteIf I were Lily in this situation, I probably wouldn’t call T. Ray either. There are examples in the book that support how T. Ray really isn’t a father to her. For example, when Lily was driving home from jail with T. Ray she was concerned about Rosaleen and said, “What about Rosaleen? You have to get her out-“. T. Ray’s response was “You’re lucky I got you out!” He wasn’t at all concerned about Lily being in jail. He only wanted her out or his sake- so she could help with the peaches and he wouldn’t have to face the embarrassment of having a kid in jail. Also, if he were a real father, he would’ve got Rosaleen out of jail too. Any real father would not let their kid’s friend stay helplessly in jail for no reason. T. Ray knew that Franklin Posey would come back and try to hurt Rosaleen even more, and he still didn’t do anything- even though he knew how much it would mean to Lily if he tried. But once again, T. Ray only cares about himself.
T. Ray is a cruel and unusual father. He doesn’t treat Lily like a daughter. He abuses Lily and forces her to do his work for him. As Lily says “Daddy” just doesn’t fit T. Ray. The quote "Any Man can be a Father; it takes Someone Special to be a Dad" shows exactly why Lily doesn’t call T. Ray “Daddy”. T. Ray isn’t there for her, to pick her up when she’s down, and to give her help when she needs it most. He’s not special; he’s just there in name.
ReplyDeleteT. Ray is a rude and selfish person. It’s no surprise to me that Deborah wanted to leave him. He wasn’t a husband. He wasn’t the type of man anyone would want to spend the rest of their lives with. That’s why Lily ran away. Who wants a man like that to be her father? Yet alone, be her dad! A father would be there to give her advice and not help her tremendously, but know that deep down he truly loves his daughter. T. Ray doesn’t seem to care one bit! Lily was right to run away, it’s the only way she might even be a little happy.
"My daddy- who I called T. Ray because "Daddy" never fit him- had pulled her out if the peach orchard, where she'd worked as one of his pickers." On page 2, is quoted by Lily describing her reasoning for calling her father T Ray. His punishment choice, Martha Whites, is cruel and inhumane. He forces Lily to keel on the grits for hours at a time for waking him up at night or going into the orchard to relax and think. "You sit here and think about me coming back and dealing with you." T. Ray even threatened Lily for just standing up for herself when he was mistreating her. As a person T. Ray is a wreck. He went to church for a while before Lily's mother died but after that he stopped going and began going downhill. Depending on the current information, T. Ray wasn't that bad of a husband, basing it off of Rosaleen's memories and also Lily's. When Lily shot his wife and her own mother, I think that T. Ray is holding a grudge of Lily for her mistake and that's why T. Ray is the "man" he is today.
ReplyDeleteLily has many reasons not to call her father “Daddy.” T.Ray doesn’t really care about or pay attention to Lily in the first place. He is more affectionate to his dog then Lily. I think, the only reason why T.Ray hasn’t left Lily is because he doesn’t want her to tell people how she thinks her mother died. Also, T.Ray has very inventive punishments that he delivers very often. If Lily so much as speaks out of line she would get punished. One of T.Ray’s biggest and most used punishment was kneeling on grits. T.Ray would make Lily kneel on grits for hours with only bathroom breaks. I think T.Ray doesn’t want to be called daddy by Lily anyway so that’s another reason why Lily refuses to call her father “Daddy.”
ReplyDeleteAs a person, I see T.Ray as neither a husband, nor father. I see T.Ray as an ill tempered man who doesn’t know how to be a good father or husband. When he was a husband, T.Ray caused her to leave him and as a father Lily refuses to call him “Daddy.” T.Ray didn’t even respect his wife’s decision to leave, and doesn’t care about Lily enough to drive her to town. T.Ray should be an alone, grumpy man with no family because that’s how he acts all the time. When Lily ran away, he became an alone grumpy man with no family.
In chapter 1, T-Ray had made Lily kneel on grits because he didn’t even listen to what Lily had to say when she was outside. When I kneeled on the grits, I expected my elbows to hurt a lot, considering the fact that Lily seemed like she was in a lot of pain. When I had put my elbows on the table, I thought it was going to hurt a lot. When I had finished my five minutes, it wasn’t so bad. Then again, I was on a desk, and only for five minutes, while Lily had to stay on wood ground, and kneel on them for an hour. Although it didn’t really sting that much, it had left a mark on my elbows. This made me realize why Lily had bruises on her knee’s.
ReplyDeleteThis punishment says that he is a cruel and inhumane person. If he punishes Lily so bad that she has bruise marks on her knees, then I must say he is not the person I would love to be around. In my opinion, Lily’s childhood had been rough. From the time she was four years old up until the time she was fourteen years old, she was abused both mentally and physically, which I think is wrong because she is just a kid. She had matured a lot quicker because just in the first chapter, she had said, “People who think dying is the worst thing don’t know a thing about life.” If she grasped that concept when she was about fourteen years old, that would probably mean she has matured quicker .
Lilly explains in the beginning of the book that the title of ‘Daddy’ does not fit him. T- Ray denies her of the simplest things. Such as bristle rollers and a decent birthday present. He doesn’t treat Lilly as a daughter; he refuses to listen to her, and doesn’t help her when he needs her. Lots of things T-ray says and does are not very father-like. When Lilly leaves school its like she hasn’t even left because she has to go home to another bully, which is sadly her father.
ReplyDeleteT-ray seems like he really was a good person in the beginning and if the incident with Lily’s mother hadn’t happened, Lily and her parents would be a very happy family yet unfortunately the incident did happen and T-ray takes out his anger and his grief on Lily. In my opinion, T-ray says things that just to make himself feel better, like when he said “ The truth is, you sorry mother ran off and left you. The day she died, she’d come back to get her things, that’s all.” Lily seemed to figure out this for herself but still is in denial.
The sorts of things that T. Ray does or says that explains Lily’s reasoning of refusing to call her father “Daddy” are how he always acts as if she’s a slave of his, and how he never seems to love her. He almost always yells at her and commands her to do chores. Whenever he thinks Lily did something bad, he punishes Lily in torturous ways, like making her kneel on Martha White grits. He never believes Lily, even if she’s telling the truth, like about the bees in her room. When Lily told him about her birthday and how she wanted this silver bracelet, he just ignored her. It seems that he doesn’t care about Lily as if she was just a worthless little bee that he abuses 24/7. No wonder Lily doesn’t call T. Ray “Daddy.” He’s nothing like a father to her, but rather a cruel tormentor.
ReplyDeleteAs a person he isn’t really the friendliest guy. I don’t think most people would really like to be around him and his personality. If I lived during his time and I knew what he was like, I’d probably go to the other side of the street if I saw him. I also think he’s a horrible, HORRIBLE, (emphasis on horrible), father, when I read what he would do to Lily. He doesn’t deserve to be a father. He doesn’t deserve to live. Oh wait, maybe that was too harsh. Anyway, he’s even worse than Cinderella’s stepmother. A parent should love and care for their child, not abuse and torment them every day. But I can’t help thinking that he might actually love Lily, but he just doesn’t show affection because he doesn’t want to ruin his pride and reputation of being strict and mean. I’m not really sure how he was as a husband, but it seems that he was just as bad a husband as he was a father because of Lily’s mother running away.
Oh, and BTW, Bigmac4, how would you know that T. Ray did brainwash Lily into thinking that she killed her mom? Unless you read ahead, you can’t actually say that. Maybe Lily did shoot her mom. T. Ray might be telling the truth, you never know with him.
Oh, and also, is it just me or is T. Ray a pretty awesome name? I’d like people to come up to me and say, “Wattup, T. Ray.”
T. Ray does not deserve to be called dad from Lily. A good father shouldn’t abuse and mistreat his own daughter. If my father made me kneel in grits for hours I would never call him daddy. T. Ray never treated Lily like his daughter so that is why she doesn’t treat him like her father. He refused to buy her things like decent clothes or a brush and it is his fault that she has no friends. I think that T. Ray is a terrible father and an even worse person. He abuses his child and told her lies like how her mother hated her. As a person he wouldn’t even bail Rosaleen out of jail. He thinks that she deserves to be beat up for what she did. I just overall hate him and that somebody needs to show him how to act properly.
ReplyDeleteLily refused to call T-Ray “Daddy,” and she has a good reason to. T-Ray obviously does not know how to handle a child as a single parent. Ever since his wife died, he has resorted to harsh punishments on Lily. He often jumps to conclusions, and does not let Lily defend her self. For example, Lily went into the backyard in the middle of the night to look at memories of her mother. T-Ray caught her, and figured she was sneaking out to see boys. To discipline her, he made her kneel on grits for an hour, until her knees began to bleed. Lily did not deserve this because she was not with boys, she was just trying to be closer to her mother who she lost when she was only four years old.
ReplyDeleteAs a person, T-Ray is just very confused, and hurt. His wife, who he had a child with, had left him and was killed. He will never be able to forget this and get over it. It is something that will constantly be in the back of his mind. He can’t run away from it, and that is a hard thing to deal with. As a husband, T-Ray seemed to have been very aggressive, and maybe changed after they got married. Lily’s mother seems like she would never marry someone like T-Ray, so I hypothesize that he was a good person, and changed after the two were married. As a father, I think he has a lot to learn, and should not be so hard on Lily. Deep down inside, I am sure he is a good person, but he needs to let it show.
T-ray is the worst father in the world. I would not blame her for not calling him dad. She doesn’t want him to be her dad. He always punishes her unjustly and she must be fed up with it. T-ray shouldn’t even be allowed to be a father especially not to Lily. He has already traumatized her enough.
ReplyDeleteMy thoughts on him are not good ones. He is a horrible person that was probably abused when he was a child. So he passes down the gene of being a bad parent. He must have been a horrible husband too if he treats his wife that way. He tries to assert his dominance with his family. I find him to be a bad man.
The reason Lily refuses to call T. Ray her dad is because of his actions and the way he is always agitated by everything she does. For example, in the beginning, when Lily wakes T. Ray up from his sleep to see the swarm of bees in her room, he becomes very cranky and annoyed of her. He kept shouting, "this better be good," and "how the house damn well be on fire." He got really annoyed and angry at her. Also, he always uses foul language around Lily. He used many bad words around her when he shouldn't have been. He also tells Lily lies. For example, he told her that Lily's mom didn't even care about her. She just came back home to get her things, but that day she was killed. Lily believes that this is a lie because T. Ray has told her several lies about things and now she can't trust him anymore.
ReplyDeleteI think that T. Ray is a terrible father to Lily. The reason I think this is because as it was stated before, he uses quite a few curse words around Lily. He isn't supposed to do that because it'll teach Lily to use bad words too. Another thing is that he doesn't really have love for Lily. It seems like T. Ray doesn't even care about her because when he was talking to Lily about how Lily's mom was killed, she expected a hug from him, but she never got one. He should've thought about saying something consoling to her so she'd feel better, but he just simply walked away and didn't even care to do something nice for her. He should try to be a better father to her.
T-Ray (Lily's Daddy) is not very fatherly (if you will). He's not the type of person who likes to hug her daughter for good grades, take the time to play the motherly role, that isn't present, or give her the tools that are practically a necessity in her life. He's a man that forces her to kneel in painful, uncooked grits when she does something that's not part of his routine. She works for him at the peach stand to sell, and even there she is a puppet on strings. All she really is a puppet on a set of strings; she does whatever he wants her to, and if it's not done correctly, it's 'thanks a lot', and out with the garbage. It's all a balancing act on her part, to maintain her close distance to danger, without actually running that gauntlet.
ReplyDeleteI find T-Ray as a horrible husband. No man would ever behave violently in front of an infant, showing the right way to deal with situations. No man that wants good things emerging out of their child would ever want to expose them to such violence, verbal and physical abuse. T-Ray can't possibly be a could husband, as Deborah left for the safety of herself. (I know where she stayed, by the way).. If he was such a good person, he wouldn't have had a woman walk out on him for safety, perhaps even the discomfort of a possible killer on the other side of the bed. To even have a gun in his possession is quite horrifying. T-Ray is a discomforting husband, father, and person.
Lily has a good reason to not call her father daddy because T-Ray doesn’t do things that a normal father would do. He doesn’t care as much as a normal father would and he didn’t act as a good husband either. An example would be when he makes Lily lean on the grits or when he lies to Lily about her mother. The thoughts that I have on T-Ray are that he is a selfish person who doesn’t have feelings for other people and he doesn’t like to talk about his feelings. If he did then I think that he would be a nicer person and he would have more friends.
ReplyDeleteT Ray is Lily’s father. He doesn’t act like a father to her though. Whenever Lily does a minor problem the punishment has to be a big one. Lily’s punishment is to stand on the grits for such a long time. Grits are really hurtful they make your knees swollen or your knees start to bleed. T Ray knows that Lily’s Mom is dead and he should care about Lily more but he doesn’t. T Ray tells Lily that her mom didn’t care about her one bit. But Lily doesn’t find that true. I think that T Ray is not fit to be a father or a husband. A father and a husband is supposed to love his family support it. But T ray is the exact opposite. T Ray discourages Lily many times.
ReplyDeleteT. Ray treats Lily in a very harmful way. This is one reason why Lily doesn’t call him “daddy”. He makes lily kneel on grits and makes her do much more different and painful punishments. I think the reason why Lily calls T. Ray by his name and not by daddy, is because he treats her so poorly and without love. T. Ray shows no compassion and love for lily what so ever. I think he is a terrible person, husband and father. I think he is a terrible husband, I know this because lily’s mother wanted to get away from him. Also, he was so bad to Lily’s mother that Lily’s mom had to pull out a gun to save herself, (which didn’t work out as she planed). Also I think T. Ray is a bad father. I think this because Lily is always complaining about him, and how she doesn’t want to live with him any longer.
ReplyDeleteLily does not call her own father daddy because of many reasons. A father in definition is a man who exercises paternal care over other persons; paternal protector or provider. T- Ray does not show any form of care towards lily because of his abuse and neglect. He doesn’t care for lily like a mother would, such as buying her new clothes and doing her hair. He also makes her kneel on “grits” which is a painful powder that causes your skin to burn. This is physical abuse as well as the emotional abuse he shows to her. He tells her that her mother left her when she died, and that she no longer loved lily. Deep inside, lily knows that is not true but can’t help to think why T-ray would make up such a horrible lie. He also does not protect her because he is hurting her in different ways. Lily has every right to not call him her father because of what he does to her and how he treats her. My thoughts on him as a human being are pathetic and worthless. How could a father who is supposed to show love and compassion towards his daughter be so cruel and demeaning? He is an extremely pathetic excuse for a provider for anything and anyone.
ReplyDeleteIn the beginning of the book Lily explains how her father does not fit the title "daddy". The reason he does not fit this name is because of how cruel and mean he is to Lily. He does not act like a father to her. The mean things he does to her is horrible. He doesn't listen to her also doesn't help her when he needs help. I honestly thing T-Ray is a horrible father and i would not want him. He also makes her kneel on grist witch really actually hurts a lot. He also blames her for everything he says everything is her fault when its actually not. T-Ray is a very abusive father to Lily and the things he does to her are really mean and bad
ReplyDeleteLily refuses to call T-ray daddy because even though he is her father, he does not act like a very good one. Some ways that T-ray act inhumane and non-fatherly towards his daughter Lily is that he makes her as a punishment kneel on grits or the "Martha Whites" as they describes them. Another reason that T-Ray does not act like a father towards Lily because she needs someone to take after her and T-Ray barely even knows she exist and only uses her as a mule or at times treats her like his slaves or workers at his peach farm which is not making very much progress. My thoughts on T-Ray that he is as human as anyone can ever be. He may be a cruel man towards his daughter and was a terrible husband. But lets look at the facts, he is just as human as you are to me.
ReplyDeleteT-ray is not called daddy by Lilly for many reasons. One reason is that he does not act like a daddy. He is always abusive towards her,makes her kneel on grits, and he never treats her like a young lady or a daughter. he brainwashes her to think that she killed her mother, when it actually was'nt her. he also doesnt make her feel like a good girl, like when he always blames her mothers disappearance on her.
ReplyDelete